Come on now, what you waiting for.. You got the keys, now shut up and drive

I'm paralyzed with fear. Yet again I see myself slipping. I claim that others are suffocating me, but yet I'm suffocating myself. I'm bringing challenges upon myself, that needn't occur. Due to my upbringing, I subconsciously seem to expect someone to rescue me, from challenge, save me from having to deal with having to DO something that I feel discomfort doing - to push myself. In reality, I'm asking to be saved, from myself. Why do I feel like I need this saving? That I can't make even simple decisions by myself. That I have such little faith in myself. I want to change that.. but how?

I quasi-feel as if I have the potential to move on past the difficulties. I see the sliver of hope, but then retreat to my comfort zone.. in my dark little corner. I'm weak, I know it. I feel the wave of change try to take me in, and I retreat. There is nothing to gain, in this. I need to pull myself together and gather focus and turn that potential energy into something. Don't be scared. There's nothing to be scared of, in this.

I have the key to turn myself around, and move forward... what am I waiting for? Shut up and drive.